Changes

When something gets pointed out to you, the glass shatters, and you’re suddenly aware.

Aware of everything that’s happened in the past, and of everything that could possibly happen in the future.

It eats at you, threatens your sleep. Sometimes it’s so intense it renders you useless and hollow. Suddenly your every thought is dependent on that one thing. A habit. An idiosyncrasy.

A change.

That’s how Munkustrap felt the day Demeter told him that she was pregnant.

Like his world had turned itself inside out.

Suddenly, every thought, every action was focused on the kit in Demeter’s belly.

His mate seemed ridiculously fragile now.

He found himself worried about hurting Demeter in ways he never used to. He starting sleeping with his arm up high, around her ribs instead of her stomach, worried that the extra weight would be bad for the growing kit. He even stopped pulling her against him when they hugged, paranoid that pressing themselves too close together would crush their kitten.

After a few days, he was actively avoiding touching her stomach at all.

It was a lot harder when she started to show. Every time he saw Demeter he couldn’t keep his eyes away from the small swell, itching to pet and nuzzle against his kitten.

Eventually Demeter had had enough.

She waited until Munkustrap was curled behind her in the nest, arm wrapped around her ribs, and linked his fingers through hers. As he relaxed behind her she slid his hand quickly down her body, pressing it firmly against the bump.

Munkustrap tensed behind her, and she was pretty sure he stopped breathing.

After what felt like hours, he huffed out a breath, his fingers carefully caressing her stomach.

She rolled towards him, watching his fingers splay across her belly, and smiled lazily.

“It’s your kitten Munkustrap.” She murmured, scratching gently behind his ears. “Not something to be scared of.”

Munkustrap glanced up at her briefly before turning his gaze back to his kitten, kneading gently at Demeter’s stomach.

“I wasn’t scared of our kit.” Munkustrap said softly, leaning down to nuzzle against the skin under his hands. “I was scared of hurting you both.”

Demeter chuckled quietly, petting over his head. “It doesn’t work like that. I really just have to make sure I’m not too stressed, and don’t fall down too much. My body takes care of the rest. At least, that’s what Jenny told me.”

Munkustrap relaxed suddenly, pressing a kiss to his kitten before resting his head against it, listening to Demeter’s breathing.

~.~.~

For the next month, Munkustrap was barely able to keep his hands and eyes away from Demeter’s
growing stomach. He hovered and fussed over her, annoyingly protective, but Demeter reveled in the attention, especially when she got too big to move easily without assistance.

Of course, it was during one of the rare moments that Munkustrap wasn’t nearby that Demeter went into labour.

She’d been left with Bombalurina, both queens dozing in the sun, when she was startled awake by a sudden feeling of discomfort. Bombalurina had woken when she hissed in pain, and immediately started fretting over her sister. Demeter reassured her sister, telling her she was fine even as her worried eyes swept the clearing, searching for her mate.

As soon as he looked at her, she beckoned him over, almost doubling over as pain swept through her.

By the time she straightened back up, Munkustrap was at her side, gathering her into his arms and carefully climbing back down to the ground.

“Go warn Jenny.” Munkustrap hissed at Bombalurina, forced to stop his progress to ease Demeter through her next contraction. They weren’t even halfway across the clearing when Jenny found them.

“This kitten is eager.” She smiled at them, following Munkustrap back to their den and teaching the tom how to rub Demeter’s back and ease her through her contractions.

Finally Munkustrap was lowering Demeter into the nest she’d made for the kitten. She reached for him and he curled himself protectively around her, rubbing and petting and nuzzling as he tried to comfort her.

She hissed, pushing her face into Munkustrap’s fur and digging her claws into his sides. Munkustrap winced slightly, but didn’t bother protesting, putting up with the abuse as Jenny busied herself poking at Demeter.

Munkustrap didn’t bother watching Jenny, focussed instead on his mate in his arms, trying his best to help her through the pains.

After what felt like hours, they heard a tiny mewl, and suddenly, all of their attention was on the small squirming bundle in Jenny’s hands. She offered the kit to Munkustrap, and before he could panic, or refuse, she was in his arms. Instinctually, he bent his head to groom her, slow licks cleaning the gunk from her fur and revealing her true colours.

Demeter batted tiredly at his arm, and Munkustrap immediately bent down to her, carefully handing her their kitten and watching fondly as she nuzzled into her mother’s fur.  

Jenny quietly finished her work, and crept out of their den, leaving the new family alone.

Demeter curled into Munkustrap tiredly, nuzzling against him as he pulled her close, both of them staring down at their kitten in amazement.

“She’s beautiful.” Munkustrap murmured finally, reaching out to pet gently down her side. Demeter hummed as she tried to force her eyes to stay open, nestling into Munkustrap’s side.

“Go to sleep love.” He murmured, kissing her forehead. He pulled the kitten towards him, settling her snugly between them both so that he could make sure she was safe and warm, and watched as Demeter’s eyes drooped.

Munkustrap barely slept that night, compelled to watch over his small family as they slept, and ensure their safety.

She was so small, but she’d already changed his life for the better.